We make a lot of bonds in our lives. We bond with our siblings, our family members, our buddies and besties, and even our co-workers and bosses- to a certain extent. But no matter how many bonds we make, there is none stronger than the bond created between a parent and a child.
The bond you make with your child has to be superglue strong, fist pump to the heart strong, stronger than steel strong. There is nothing that can break it, nothing that can weaken it, and it starts building as soon as your child is born. That’s why it’s so important to start bonding with your baby from day one.
According to Dr. Daniel Messenger, Ph.D., "Attachment isn't about acting a ‘correct' way. It's about really watching her (your baby) and responding to her sensitively.” So keep up the good work! Here are some more ways for you to continue building those powerful foundations:
What could be more bonding than the actual skin on skin delivery of the mother's milk to the baby's mouth? It's the most primal link between mother and child, and especially important in early bonding. When you feed your child with your own milk, you are letting him know that he can depend on you to meet his most basic needs, and that will grow into a long-lasting, positive association.
2. Look Into Your Babies Eyes
It’s a safe bet that they’ll light up when you do. Eye contact may come second only to skin contact when it comes to bonding. When you look your baby in the eyes, they see that you recognize that there is a very important person lurking behind them. Bottle time is especially conducive to locking eyes. Make bottle time into bonding time by focusing on your baby while feeding him.
3. Give Him A Massage
Giving your baby a massage can be therapeutic for both of you. Even the tiniest little muscles need an occasional rubdown once in a while. Not only does massage relax and calm the infant, but it also improves blood circulation, and if you have magic fingers, you can rest assured your lap will be the best seat in the house.
4. Listen To Her Heartbeat
A baby’s heartbeat is her life force. It’s the sign that she’s healthy, powerful and capable of great things. Babies are comforted by their mother’s heartbeats, and mothers are comforted by babies heartbeats. Listen to your heart and listen to her heart as well. It can be a wonderful bonding experience.
Chances are after your kids get to a certain age, they're not going to let you kiss them at all, so we say, get ‘em while you can. Pepper those sweet cheeks, heads and lips with kisses at every available opportunity – they don’t call it “stealing kisses” for nothing. Expressing love for a baby not only helps to build a unique relationship between mother and baby, but it also helps the baby to build healthy relationships in the future.
6. Look In A Mirror Together
People tell you all the time that your baby is your “mirror image," but that doesn't mean she doesn't have has a mirror image of her own. Take your little "Mini-Me" over to the mirror with you so she can see how spitting your images are. It will teach her about human faces, relationships, and identity.
7. Give Him A Pet Name
Whether it's "Boo," "Buddy," or "Bean," giving your child a name that only you call him by will help to build a one of a kind connection. It's like a secret that only the two of you share. What’s in a name? A whole lot apparently. Customized names can build customized relationships.
8. Get Goofy
Parenthood comes with a license that entitles you to do anything to entertain your child by any means necessary. Getting goofy in public places is part of the permit. Sharing a laugh with your child is worth any expense, even if it means making animal sounds in the middle of the Dollar Store. Happiness brings its own rewards.
9. Take Him Out On the Town
A crucial part of building relationships is sharing experiences. When you go for a walk with your baby, he may be looking ahead, but he knows whose pushing the stroller. Take him to the park, the mall, or even grocery shopping. Babies are generally not too picky. Sometimes it's more about who you're with than where you are.
10. Get Down and Boogie
When you're turning up the music, turn your baby on to it. A shared love of music can create bonds that transcend time and space. Make a playlist of 5 of your favorite songs and play them for your child. When she starts to boogie, it will give new meaning to "shaking it like your mama told you how."